The Era Of Ready Made Families
These days with the divorce rate out of the ball park, you can expect to run into lots of potential dating partners that already have children of their own. Unless youre in your teens, the probability of dating someone with children is very high. Sometimes, even teens already have at least one child, but thats an entirely new subject.
What you have to decide when youre looking for someone to date and possibly form a relationship with is how you feel about the possibility of a readymade family. You may be fine with it, particularly if you like kids and are hoping to have a big family. It can also work out if you love kids but, for some reason, cant have your own. In that case, it would be a dream come true. You could have the family you always wanted in spite of any personal physical difficulties.
On the other hand, suppose youre someone that hasnt really decided if you even want to have children. Youre just starting to get on your feet with your career and you hadnt exactly planned on being responsible for children until youre a bit more settled in your life. It was your intention to enjoy some couples time with someone before going into all of the serious stuff such as marriage and children. Thats a smart way to think, too, because you may as well face it; children change your life drastically forever. You pretty much need to do as many of the things you always wanted to do early in life and before you commit to having children.
Now, suppose you meet someone that you really like and connect with. You spend some time talking with him and find that you have so many things in common that you feel youve met someone that has true potential for a relationship. Then he drops the little bomb on you that hes divorced and the father of 2 young children. At first, you think well, it wont be that bad because he probably only has them part of the time. Thats when he further challenges you with the fact that he has primary custody of them and his ex-wife gets visitation. Now what will you do?
That situation can be a tough one because now you really like this guy and hes thrown you the biggest curve ball he could have. This is a situation that you really need to think through. On the one hand, you know youre not ready to be a full time mother. But, again, this guy is so nice and you really do connect in a positive way.
Its a big decision and one that you shouldnt make lightly. There will definitely be some weighing on either side because you dont want to make the wrong choice. One more thing to keep in mind, though, is that even if you really do like this man, youve just met him so you havent had time to truly become attached. If you have some serious doubts about jumping into a readymade family, it may be better to cut your losses before its too late.
Countries which have Legalized Divorce
In countries which are predominantly Catholic, divorce is not welcomed by the culture which is greatly influenced by religion. For example in the Philippines and Malta, divorce is illegal. Because of the Catholic Churchs influence, a number of countries in Europe like France banned divorce. As a result, people in these locations may seek out other areas in order to get divorced.
Comparing and Contrasting
In countries which have legalized divorce, separating from your spouse may be much simpler than in those where divorce remains illegal. In countries where divorce is illegal and annulment may be the only way of getting out of a problem marriage, matters can get much more complicated.
The process of annulment may take a much longer period of time than the procedure of divorce. Divorce is the termination of a marriage contract. Annulment, on the other hand, deems the marriage null and void, as if one were never married in the first place. This makes couples think twice before considering the final step of annulment. But this can have its pros and cons.
Culture and Divorce
Most of the time, a woman may even stay in an abusive relationship for a long period just because of the cultures view on separation. This is exactly where countries which have legalized divorce have the upper hand. In these cultures, getting out of any kind of abusive relationship as soon as possible is emphasized greatly. Looking at it this way, divorce becomes a tool for saving those spouses in detrimental marriages. But divorce itself may also be abused.
Marriage is a serious decision for anyone and it should not be taken lightly with the thought that one may just as easily get a divorce.
Debate upon the ease in which a couple may get divorced in some cultures has also long been discussed. The Las Vegas ease of tying the knot and just as easily cutting it off has been highly criticized by conservative cultures.
Getting married for a couple of hours just for the feel of it and then getting divorced soon after in just the same hurry is a clear example of how divorce can be abused.
It’s Me Or The Dog
How many times have you heard the phrase Its me or the dog? Most of the time its said in a joking manner, but there are those occasions that when these words are uttered, theyre totally serious. It may not be such a big deal unless its someone that youre hoping to have a romantic relationship. Seriously, you can say Ok, bye to your friend, your brother, sister or even a parent. But when it comes to someone that youre attracted to and want to go further with, its a lot more difficult to just wave goodbye.
Obviously, if youve got a pet, then you love animals. This is a very good quality in you. People that love animals are generally very good people. Taking that into consideration, turn that thinking in another direction. What does the fact that your person of interest doesnt like animals say about him? Doesnt it make you feel as if you should be looking at him a bit more closely? If someone has no love for animals, theres usually a very huge hole within them somewhere.
Take a very close look at this person that seems to hate your pet. How does your pet react around him? Animals are pretty good at picking up on whether or not people like them. If your pet is somewhat hostile to your new friend, theres probably a reason. However, on the other hand, if this guy keeps claiming that he doesnt like dogs, for instance, but your dog keeps trying to sit on his lap and lick his face, chances are that this guy is trying to sell you a bill of goods. In this instance, the more time that your dog and your man spend together, they will most likely become fast friends before you know it.
You also have to consider that if your man is telling you that he LOVES dogs but all your dog wants to do is bite him and growl at him, you need to consider that he just might be lying to you. Also, if hes lying to you about that, then what else might he be lying to you about? Your dog could be protecting you from getting involved with a less than savory character.
In the end, though, youre the only one that can decide if you want to throw over your loyal pet in favor of a new guy that may or may not work out. Before you make the rash choice to take your once beloved pet to the pound, consider what a great companion he has been to you. Hes probably outlasted several boyfriends already, and he just might have outlasted this one, too. Think it all through very carefully because there are not guarantees that this guy is going to be the one. Even if he does have potential, just how much could you possibly have in common with someone that isnt going to allow you to have a pet if youre going to be with him? Dont be shocked if he brings home a pet snake one day. Thats when youll know that you probably should have kept your dog.
There Are Ways To Lead Her Back Getting Back An Ex-Girlfriend
If you find theres a certain ex thats been on your mind a lot lately, dont give up hope that she wont one day be yours again. There are a few steps you can take to grabbing her attention and winning her affections once more. As long as you truly desire her, the possibilities are endless.
The first thing you want to do is take some time to think about your relationship with that girl. What went wrong? What drove her away? If you cant really figure things out, ask some friends what they thought about the relationship. Your friends may also have some advice about getting her back. You always want your first step to be the thinking period. Whenever you identify the problems of the relationship the first time around, youre free to remedy them this time.
The next thing to do is get to know her better. Learn more about her. Explore her interests. Talk to her if you can. Get onto her brain wave and really try to understand the things she enjoys. It will tell you a lot about her, including the kind of man she wants you to be. This step may take a while, but if you really want her, its worth the time invested.
The 3rd thing is to change. Things didnt work out with you two the way they were before, assuming you were yourself. So why try the same thing expecting different results? You should n ever fashion yourself against your own will. Make sure that everything that youre doing is what you want to do. The things you are changing are making you better. If you conform to a niche that you dont understand or even like, you are doomed for another failed relationship.
If you want to win her back without having to drastically alter yourself, it could be as easy as finding her type of bad boy. Every girl has the perfect dream man. Then she has his evil twin. If you cant be Mr. Nice, then maybe you should be the more devilish fantasy.
One thing you can count on that will appeal to all women is confidence. No one wants to be stuck on a date with a wallflower. If you are nothing but quiet and dull, most women would lose interest pretty fast. So whether you choose to embrace her perfect dream man, or her slightly darker desires, you must be outspoken. Its not to say you should talk her ear off, but most girls like men that can hold an intelligent conversation, flatter them, and fluster them all at once. A quick mind is a sexy mind.
The last thing to peak her interest, of course, would be a nice body. This entails whatever body type she prefers. Whether its hefty, chiseled, or skinny, every girl has a preference. And even if you like your body as it is, note that personal hygiene never hurts.
How Long To Wait For A Proposal
Each year there are many women worldwide that are thrilled to accept a marriage proposal along with a beautiful engagement ring to go with it during the holidays. On the other hand, there are also many women that were sorely disappointed when the holidays passed without a proposal or a ring. Out of this group of women, there will be many wondering just how long they need to wait for their men to pop the question.
There really arent any hard and fast rules when it comes to this dilemma. Thats what makes it somewhat difficult to know when to stick it out or when to walk away. Granted, there ARE some guidelines that can be used to gauge whether or not youre wasting your time on a dead end relationship, and this may be just about all the help youll get with this issue.
To begin with, if youre in a relationship that has gone on for ten years and hes still living at home with his parents, chances are that you wont be getting a marriage proposal any time soon, if ever. You may as well face it; hes in a comfortable situation. Hes got a roof over his head, gets his laundry done and his meals cooked for minimal cost. Then, hes got you meeting his social and sexual needs. Why should he give up all of that and take on the responsibilities of marriage?
Thats one extreme of relationships. The other is when youve just met someone and have only been going out for a couple of weeks. You probably havent even had sex yet. In this situation, you need to wait a while longer before expecting a marriage proposal and a ring. Youre still very much in that getting acquainted stage and theres no need to rush this part.
Now, for those couples that have been with each other anywhere from a year to five years, its time to figure out where the relationship is going, and what each of you want from it. Youve had time to get well acquainted with each other and should know whether or not youre interested in spending the rest of your life together. If your man is still hedging on a commitment and you want the house and picket fence, its time to sit down and have an open and honest conversation about where to go from there.
Sure, there are those rare couples that have been together a month, decide to get married and then remain happily married for fifty years. That doesnt happen very often, though. It seems to be important to get to know someone pretty well BEFORE getting married rather than AFTER. In that way, youre sure to have a good idea of what youre getting in the deal and the type of personality youll be living with and dealing with.
The important thing to remember is that these things usually happen when theyre meant to, and if the proposal doesnt come within a reasonable amount of time, it probably wasnt meant to ever happen.